Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

Posts Tagged ‘survey says’

Guys Hate It When You’re Annoying; Girls Would Rather You Not Fart (Survey Part Deux)

Posted by AllieB on October 13, 2011

I thought that doing a second survey was a really great idea, and I’m thinking I thought wrong. The last one was pretty entertaining; this one – not so much. My questions weren’t particularly interesting or insightful, which is probably part of the problem. To keep the lameness to a minimum, I am therefore ignoring the multiple choice questions and just sharing the write in responses. I didn’t do much editing, but a few things had to go.

One thing I was not overwhelmed by was the number of participants :| Whatever, ok, here we go…

First, the Boys: “I hate it when my girlfriend (or whatever you have)….” 

– Is sad

– Could go on forever here, even with a girl I love. We were made to piss each other off to a certain extent because nothing easy is worth doing.

– Wish there was more room to elaborate. Will send you a pdf file later this week with my essay

– gets all in her own head and lets it make her mad/sad/depressed.

– tells me I “need to update my wardrobe”. Not b/c it’s not true, just b/c it’s repeated in those exact same words time and time again, like the previous time didn’t happen.

– Doesn’t stay active and exercise on a regular basis.

– starts random fights for no reason whatsoever on a frequent basis.

– Is annoying

– has an opinion about sports. Just watch the game and cheer on the right team, but please no input on what is actually happening in the game.

– Is a whiny bitch and feels entitled

– is moody. The love of your life, so fun one minute and a total bitch the next.

– Tells me that Johnny T’s teeth are whiter than mine.

– is always late

– Wont give me a ride to my car

– Calls to tell me an irrelevant story about her day…especially when its not funny in the slightest.

– busts my balls

-gets drunker than I do

In your gf’s defense, Johnny T does have exceptionally white teeth. Girls, take note: be less sad, go for a run, don’t get too drunk, be on time, stop whining, be less bitchy, don’t tell that ‘irrelevant’ story…jeez. Sorry I asked. You can hang on to that PDF essay, I’m pretty sure I’m not interested.

Now the Ladies: “I hate it when my boyfriend (or whatever you have)…” 

– farts in the car

– fails to tell me he is leaving town for a month. (commonly referred to as an “ex-boyfriend”)

– belittles me in front of his friends in an attempt to project coolness amongst his male peers…fyi dude, your the one that looks like an idiot. And you have issues with insecurity. deal. breaker.

– tries to wear polo shirts w/ stripes on them. no.

– fails to exist

– Bitches about my drunkenness. Or when he eats on the sofa.

– …….not enough room to answer

– tries to order for me at a restaurant. I’ll interrupt.

– puts it off on me when he is not social or does not go out.  It pisses me off so much. Just tell your friends that you do not want to go out, don’t put it off on me like that. Not Fair!

– acts immature

burns incense* and wears mesh shorts (not at the same time or, yea, maybe at the same time too)

– farts under the covers

– Snores

– talks about how hot your friends are

– eats late night & leaves crumbs & pb finger prints all over my kitchen, makes this terrible sound when he scratches his throat, tells me he’ll come to bed as soon as he finishes his beer but really stays up to burn incense

– chain smokes

– calls me dude.

– Hangs out with his girlfriend

– says he will do something and doesn’t. False promises suck. Duh.

– puts dirty dishes on the counter or in the sink instead of the dishwasher.

– ignores me and plays with the cat instead

– Leaves his dirty clothes everywhere and is very messy

– eats healthier than I do!

– won’t fight back – what an idiot.

*These boys are not burning incense, if you get my drift…

I don’t really know what to do with these – some of y’all might need to reassess your relationship status, and some of you are kind of anal… no offense. I’m having a hard time coming up with a theme – each person who responded hates a different thing that their Significant Other or whomever does, and I guess there’s really no rhyme or reason to how or why things do or don’t work out. Deep Thoughts, by BBT. Guys: best of luck to you… Ok, no more surveys.

Me: what are you doing tonight?

You: going to Kramer’s for Matt’s birthday!!

 :(

Friendly reminder: I choose the winner of the $20 iTunes gift card at noon tomorrow, so ya better  hurry over to Facebook and like the Baxter Bark Twice page if you want a chance to win…!

Posted in Arbitrary, Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , | 9 Comments »

Who gets around and who doesn’t

Posted by AllieB on May 10, 2011

Now this is interesting: your, eh, success with the opposite sex could be dictated by much more than your looks, personality, or lack thereof – it could have a lot to do with your given moniker…

If you’re a dude, it’s good to be Chris…less so Edward.

Ladies, if you’re Vanessa you might be promiscuous, and if you’re Dorothy…you probably own some red shoes.

My double standard is definitely showing – Chris is lucky and Vanessa is promiscuous? Thanks a lot, modern day society. I just wrote this whole paragraph about names and what they make me think about people, but it got too political and potentially offensive, so I erased and will simply allow you to make your own interpretations of the data compiled by someone else. BBT is a controversy-free zone…ish.

But really, I think we can all agree that it is not shocking to see that Tamara is #3 on the list on the left…I mean, c’mon.

Equally not shocking: Taylor Momsen and Jessica Szohr have been officially dropped from Gossip Girl. To the first I say: good riddance!! To the second: I think you are cool in real life, so leaving the WORST ROLE EVER will only lead to good things. Seriously, Vanessa blows. I haven’t really been keeping up with GG, mostly because it’s unwatchable, but I do know that I do not like this new Charlie person – Serena’s cuz – who’s been signed on as a regular. In last night’s episode, during the heat of a make-out, she asked Dan Humphrey to call her Serena…in the words of NYMag’s Daily Intel: minus 1,999,748 points. Mega creep.

Lastly, on a more G-rated note, I wrote a blurb featuring Scout for the Home, my favorite store owned by my favorite person named after my second favorite dog, for Buckhead Patch. Check it out, recommend it, etc…not for me, but for Scout.

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , , | 6 Comments »

21 Questions

Posted by AllieB on March 29, 2011

I often filch my material from other people. Today’s post is no exception.

NYMag has a section called 21 Questions where they ask various people…21 questions. I’m changing the Q’s to match ATL and taking the questionnaire myself – here’s an example of a real one with Sarah Hyland (Hayley from Modern Family). This is me being honest.

Name: Allie

Age: 19 years older than an 8 year old

Neighborhood: Buckhead

Occupation: Nonprofit Development with a side of online media consulting and a focus on blogging. I’ve got all kinds of balls in the air

Who’s your favorite Atlantan, living or dead, real or fictional? Ludacris or Margaret Mitchell

What’s the best meal you’ve eaten in Atlanta? This is a very difficult question. Floataway Cafe by Emory is definitely amongst the best meals I’ve ever had, but so is the Mr C’s Philly Cheesesteak. I’m an equal opportunity indulger.

In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job? I juggle the aforementioned balls.

What’s the last thing you saw at The Georgia Dome? No one ever takes me to Falcons games…the last thing I saw at The Georgia Dome was the Monster Truck Rally. We wore fake teeth, cut off denim, some of us wore Aerosmith message tees (moi), brought in our own funnel and sat in Warrick Dunne’s box. It was one of my most fun times.

What’s your favorite medication? Airborne

What’s hanging above your sofa? Pictures of my trip to Greece with Nancy.

Who is your mortal enemy? Hilary. And birds – I hate birds.

When’s the last time you drove a car? I drove this morning to work – it takes 2.5 minutes

How has the Recession affected you? Back in 2009 my job gave me a raise and then took it away two paychecks later. That sucked.

What makes someone an Atlantan? Innate knowledge of back roads…the ability to get out of town, heading South, without getting on the Connector…running the Peachtree Road Race at least once…attending Braves games at The Atlanta Fulton County Stadium…riding The Pink Pig at Macy’s Downtown…spending an evening in the OK Cafe parking lot.

THE END. I deleted like half of the Q’s – that was the most godforsaken boring survey I’ve ever taken, and I have taken a LOT surveys. Besides, now all I can think about is how much I want to go back to Greece…

Paradise Beach, Mykonos

Seriously, wtf is this weather – it’s almost April. If I wanted it to be cold and dreary at the end of March I’d move to BUFFALO FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. The Super Paradise is looking more appealing than ever right now…Yacht Week in Greece, anyone? Bueller? Tyler Perry?

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , , | 3 Comments »

A BBT Exclusive: Survey of the Sexes

Posted by AllieB on January 27, 2011

Inspired by literary masterpieces such as Cosmopolitan and Maxim, I decided to do a short survey asking guys and girls what they like about each other in a very physical, on-the-surface sense. I’ve done the leg-work, I did the research, and now I have the answers…ish.

Without further ado…

  • Of the 19 males who participated, 68% are in a serious relationship, 32% are not
  • Of the 35 females, 66% are in a serious relationship, 34% are not
  • Ok, now for the good stuff

Q & A with the dudes:

Personally, I’m very pleased with the outcome of ass vs boob…to the second, I’m a bit surprised with Athletic Gear. I’d have thought that Corporate Attire would’ve been second, or perhaps Costume…shows what I know!

Lastly, here are some excerpts from the open ended statement, “I love it when my significant other/crush….”

– looks and acts particularly hot

– makes me laugh

– laughs

– answers the phone

– does something spontaneous

– Cooks gourmet meals

– Laughs

– strips

– Does pretty much anything totally unexpected.

– gets drunk and dances

– makes breakfast for me, cleans my house, does my laundry, is extremely rich, dresses up like richard simmons in bed

– doesn’t wear cardigans

If your answer is missing, that’s because it was outrageously inappropriate and I thank you very little for sharing such crassness with me. As for the ones I could include, my favorite is “doesn’t wear cardigans” because that is so random, and regarding “answers the phone” – it concerns me that this is what you love most about your significant other or crush…it doesn’t sound like things are going so well…

Q & A with the ladies:

I just realized I forgot to take my own survey. Dunce. Anyway – so, now you know: we don’t care much about your wardrobe, bank account, or abdominal region, but, unlike you, we don’t so much prefer the workout look. That’s likely because if a boy is in athletic gear, it means he probably smells like feet. Also, girls look better in spandex than guys do.

I gave girls the chance to answer the open-ended statement, “My favorite thing about my significant other/crush….” I was going to do excerpts, but they’re either redundant or ALSO much too inappropriate to share on BBT (turns out I have some pervy friends), so instead I will paraphrase what 35 females said is their favorite thing about their boo/wannabe boo and include a few noteworthy quotes:

  • he makes me laugh
  • he is considerate of me and values our relationship
  • he loves me in spite of how crazy I am
  • he is hot
  • he works really hard
  • I can embarrass myself in front of him
  • when he cooks for me
  • “his newfound love for reading”
  • “his bed-head”
  • “when he wears his glasses”

The End. I think my favorite part of this thing was reading the write-in responses, except the ones that were gross. People are weird, and some of you need to wash your mouths out with soap. I suppose that, overall, the results aren’t earth-shattering, but this wasn’t exactly the Spanish Inquisition…

Is it 5 yet? AWD’s…who’s with me??

Posted in Arbitrary, Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , , , | 16 Comments »

The Man Repeller

Posted by AllieB on January 5, 2011

Meet & Greet: The Man Repeller – a new blog JBax (aka Baxter Bark Thrice) has introduced me to.

Boys have a different taste in girls clothing than girls do. I got curious about the preferences of the males in my immediate social circle so I polled a few friends, inquiring as to what things they find appealing and what things are not so much. Be advised, these responses will shock you to your very core…

Likes: mini-skirts, mini-skirts with boots, any kind of jeans “that fit good,” fur, sequins, tight capri work-out pants, when hair is pulled up and reveals the neck, and, to paraphrase, “anything that shows as much skin as possible.”

Dislikes: enormous sunglasses, too much perfume and/or makeup, anything by Lily Pulitzer, fur, sequins, obviously unnatural hair color, visible panty lines

Unanimous response, more or less: we don’t really care what girls wear as long as it doesn’t look bad.

Well, there you have  it – thank you very much to the gentlemen who humored me; your opinion is greatly valued here at BBT. To the ladies: better take note if you’re lookin for a boo.

Anyway, this blog is pretty funny.

MAN·RE·PELL·ER [MAHN-REE-PELLER]

–noun

outfitting oneself in a sartorially offensive way that will result in repelling members of the opposite sex. Such garments include but are not limited to harem pants, boyfriend jeans, overalls (see: human repelling), shoulder pads, full length jumpsuits, jewelry that resembles violent weaponry and clogs.

Girl 1: What are you wearing tonight?

Girl 2: My sweet lime green drop crotch utility pants

Girl 1: Oh, so we’re man repelling tonight?

The two photos and commentary below are an excerpt from her recent post, Trend Spotting: Red Lips, Man Repeller or Propeller? I really like this girl:

from Who is Bobb-Paris

I applaud her effort at trying to include a small bit of sex appeal via lace bralette, but the chambray shirt and high-waisted pajama pantaloons make this an immediate Man Getter fail. Good for you, Fupa Fran.

from Who is Bobb-Paris

Perhaps another effort at exuding a small bit of sex appeal? I see London, I see France, I see your granny-underpants. Sorry, Charlie. There’s a dead animal around your neck.

Upon further perusal, I’m realizing it’s not just about what repels men and what doesn’t – at least not singularly – she’s clearly v fashion forward and has some good ideas about recreating couture when you can’t afford it, item wishlists, etc…she’s also been featured as a guest blogger on ShopBop, Urban Outfitters, Lucky Magazine – the list goes on. Point is, she is a revered fashion commentator, but her approach is witty and interesting and more appealing to the masses.

Ms. Man Repeller is evidently something of a blogging genius.

Posted in Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , | 5 Comments »