I find Russell Brand to be completely hilarious. It’s his delivery, his off-the-wall sentiments expressed in a matter-of-fact manner, to the point where, as the listener/reader, you’re prepared to find the utter nonsense streaming from his mouth completely legitimate and normal.

Case in point (excerpts from Vulture):

• Per an audience member’s question, he doesn’t have plans to collaborate with Tim Burton, but he’d like to. “We’d get on. We could talk about hair and Gothic fairy tales, England, whimsy, and tortured adolescence.”

• When he met the Queen of England, he was somehow with James Blunt, “whose voice is indiscernible in my mind from a clown’s horn” and who was once also a member of the Royal Guard. “That’s not fair! They’ve got all sorts of things to talk about. Like, ‘Oh, do you remember when you used to guard me? Thanks.’ What am I going to say? ‘Oh, I’m Shagger of the Year.’ She’s smiling rather generously, but part of me knows that that is just the remaining smile from James Blunt and it’s about to crumble into a deep frown.”

Maybe it’s just me…I don’t know, I think he’s hysterical.  I also think this video of Alphonso Smith of the Detroit Lions doing the Carlton Dance is funny. It’s hardly brand new information, but it’s Monday morning, so I don’t much care if I’m on the cutting edge or not.

Last and most certainly least, Ken Paves and Jessica Simpson are splitsville. Perhaps it’s been this relationship that’s perpetuated her fugliness, and now she’s on to bigger (no pun intended) and better…! I’m definitely interested to hear her new holiday album – I like pop stars’s holiday albums the best. Read: Mariah Carey.

Oh wait, one more thing: that is ENOUGH, Taylor Momsen. I wonder if one day, many years from now, she’ll be considering a family of her own and then remember, “goshdarnit, I hope those pictures of me dressing like a gothic prostitute with a penchant for violence aren’t still floating around…”