Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

Posts Tagged ‘books’

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Post about how BBT is awesome and The Bachelor is not

Posted by AllieB on January 4, 2012

BBT is not an open book; that was never the plan. Mayhaps one day I’ll start an anonymous blog so I can finally do surveys with the sorts of questions the male contingent has asked that I ask – none of which I can even kind of describe to you here – but til then I like to hold my cards close re: real facts and information. Be that as it may, I share with you some statistics about BBT. Sharing these goes directly against everything I just said.

  • since its conception in July 2k10, I have published 279 posts on Baxter Bark Twice.
  • in 2011, BBT was viewed almost 100,000 times (NOT counting spam, bots, or spiders – I like the numbers a whole lot more when I include those guys, but…the blogging oath and all that). According to my WordPress Jetpack Site Stats, this means that if BBT was a concert at Madison Square Garden, it would take about 5 sold-out performances for that many people to see it. Neat. Kind of an odd metaphor, but it’s nice to have a visual.
  • 37 percent of all visits were new visits, the remaining 63 percent, obviously, returning. Of those 63 percent returning visitors, 51 percent visited over 25 times. Super neat.

This sounds an awful lot like bragging and a little bit like a math problem, neither of which are things BBT condones, but I’m kinda proud of myself – especially given my incredibly scattered content and lack of direction. Besides, a blog is nothing without her readers, so it’s really you I have to thank…except Hilary.

MUZZLE. Let’s talk about something else.

As much as I abhor all things Bachelor/Bachelorette, I tuned in for the season premier on Monday. It is insane. IT IS SO INSANE. What on EARTH is happening?! Sloan Crosley – you recall my bestie Sloan – tweeted that she’d like to be a Behind the Scenes Manipulator on The Bachelor. I agree. First, there’s the Monica v Jenna feud, next you’ve got Monica aggressively coming on to Blakely and them canoodling on the chaise, and then there’s Jenna going absolutely, completely BATSH*T BONKERS and crying nonstop for hours (cute dress, though – good beadwork). I just don’t even know what to make of the season, especially when the Bachelor in question is Ben. He was such a non-presence in the first episode it easily could have been called 30 Totally Loony Women Dressed Like Skanks and Drinking Too Much in a Random House For No Reason At All. There’s no way I can watch another second I’ll see if I can stick it out for another week, but I’m not optimistic.

From left: Jenna, the spineless crier, and Monica, the unhinged pseudo-lesbian psychopath, both of whom made it thru the first rose ceremony. Houston, we have a problem.

For a more comprehensive recap, I - begrudgingly – direct you towards Betches Love This Site. They pretty much nailed it…but of course they did; it’s right up their alley.

As for upcoming topical topics, people have been asking for some Facebook etiquette tips. Or not tips so much as what is absolutely NOT okay to share on the book of face. I tread lightly in this area as there is a very real chance I could offend an avid reader. I have an illness and it’s called pleasing people. I think I need to get over that. Any tips? Kara?

Oh, I just finished a very good book: The Rules of Civility by Amor Towles. I reserved it at the library like 5 months ago, and it just came in – I couldn’t even remember what it was about or why I wanted to read it, but it was excellent. It takes place in 1938 in New York City – actually, People Magazine can say it better than I can: “Put on some Billie Holiday, pour a dry martini and immerse yourself in the eventful life of Katey Kontent…[Towles] clearly knows the privileged world he’s writing about, as well as the vivid, sometimes reckless characters who inhabit it.” Recommend for females only, I think. A, go ahead and order it…for boys, READ THE HUNGER GAMES.

There is more than one relevant item on this list of 20 New Year’s Resolutions for 20-Somethings. Even if you’ve already rounded out your list of NY Ressies, you should check these out. Even if you’re not in your 20’s or think you’re better than resolutions, reading this is worth a minute of your time. Credit: Haley G.

Posted in Arbitrary, Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , , | 6 Comments »

I’m in a glass case of emotion: the story of BBT

Posted by AllieB on December 8, 2011

Today’s inspiration: the word “inspiration.”

My Idol Person I Like a Normal Amount: Sloane Crosley. Sloane is why Baxter Bark Twice is even extant; she is who I wish to be. I hope she doesn’t have a Google alert set up for her name and reads this. Actually, I hope she does. Hi, Sloane. Sloane has written two books: I Was Told There’d be Cake and How Did You Get This Number? Both are compilations of personal essays ranging in subject matter from bridesmaid woes to international travel to failed relationships and hot-off-the-truck furniture. She is really funny and frank and sometimes it seems like she takes the thoughts from my head, aligns them in an articulate and coherent manner, and writes them down. Pallison had the good fortune to run into Sloane on Sunday at a Barney’s Co-op in NYC. She co-opted (wordplay!) her in the dressing room, and absolutely spewed word vomit about how she and her friend Allie were her biggest fans, how we’re both friends with her on Facebook (true story), and how that line out of How Did You Get This Number, “it wasn’t as real as you thought it was” changed both of our lives. (Read the book. You’ll see what we mean.) Sloane, ever graceful, handled the situation with aplomb. Anyway, in an ideal world, BBT’s posts will parlay into longer, more personal essays, multiply several times in number, and become compilations that will be published. Fingers crossed!

Sorry for saying “spewed word vomit” with regard to your actions, Pal. I probably could have opted for a different choice of words – I didn’t, but I could have.

Person Whose Closet I Want:

Olivia Palermo. Gah.

The Movie From Which “Baxter Bark Twice” Originated: Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy. Baxter is the name of Ron’s dog, and, after Baxter is drop-kicked over a bridge (see below), he goes missing. Later in the movie, Ron receives a call from someone who he obviously assumes is his lost dog, and says, “Hello? Who’s there? Hello? Who is this? Baxter… is that you? Baxter! Bark twice if you’re in Milwaukee…” See? My last name is Baxter, so it makes sense. Team Newnan can take credit for this moniker.

Weeeeeeeee!

So, that’s how that happened. I always assume that everyone knows why Baxter Bark Twice is called Baxter Bark Twice, but I suppose if you’ve never seen a movie or if you hate to laugh, you could very well have no idea. Glad I was able to clear things up. If you’re looking to kill some time, I highly recommend visiting IMDB and reading quotes from the movie. I could do this all day.

Veronica Corningstone: I will have you know that I have more talent and more intelligence in my little finger than you do in your entire body, sir.
Ron Burgundy: You are a smelly pirate hooker.
Veronica Corningstone: You look like a blueberry.
Ron Burgundy: Why don’t you go back to your home on Whore Island?
Veronica Corningstone: Well, you have bad hair.

Ok, the end. Have a very thirsty Thursday!

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , , , | 9 Comments »

Struggleville Shrimp

Posted by AllieB on September 26, 2011

I am having a blog-related identity crisis. Whenever people ask me what my blog is about, the answer with which I usually respond is, “nothing.” Now there’s a glowing recommendation. Please, everyone, read my blog about absolutely nothing! For this reason, I think I might take some time and figure out what Baxter Bark Twice is all about. I’m not eschewing BBT altogether – I mean, there’s some good stuff here – but I need some direction.

Mel: I’d like to see you have a little direction.
Cher: I have direction!
Josh: Yeah, towards the mall.

Cher and I are totes on the same page…

Meanwhile, here’s what I think about some stuff:

READ: Girls in White Dresses. If you are a dude, skip to the next item. This book is about 20-30 year olds in New York City just doing stuff that normal people of that age do. It’s funny and relevant and a legit page turner. It’s kind of a fresh take on the whole Everyone I Know Is Getting Married thing, but it also talks about first jobs, first homes, first loves, and my soul mate this guy who is very wealthy, suffers from a severe case of OCD and, once a week, cooks up a box of Kraft mac n’ cheese and eats it straight from the pan, mauling it like a lion might its prey. It’s not quite as strange when read in context. This is a quick and easy yet somehow still poignant read.

WATCH: 2 Broke Girls. It was funny. The two main characters are funny, and I think there’s great potential. Tonight @ 8:30 – CBS.

WATCH: Revenge. Ok, I’m hooked. I have no idea how this show could possibly last longer than one season, but that is fine with me so long as it’s a season full of episodes like last week’s pilot. I mean, it’s obviously trashy, but it’s filmed in the lovely setting of the Hamptons, and the main character (Rebecca from Brothers and Sisters) doesn’t annoy me that much. The story line is rife with scandal, extra-marital affairs, addiction, secrecy, blackmail, and a really cute yellow lab named Sam…basically it has all the makings of good, quality television. Wednesdays @ 10 p.m. – ABC.

DO NOT WATCH: Whitney. In a word: AWKWARD. Actually, I’ll probably watch it a couple more times before I ditch it completely, but I don’t do well with live studio audiences.

DRINK: Bleasdale Broad-Side Shiraz Cabernet Malbec. It is a blend, according to Captain Obvious, and it’s one of the more delicious reds I’ve had recently: very drinkable with any of a number of things, I’m sure – I had it with pizza. It retails for about $15 in stores, give or take, and sells for $24/bottle at Treehouse. Warning: don’t actually drink it at Treehouse because they will serve it to you piping hot and in a 3 oz glass – take it home to chill and enjoy in a more reasonably sized glass, like this one.

So, I’m a work in progress.

Over-thinking it in Atlanta,

BBT.

Sidebar – re: today’s heading, do you remember the Struggleville Shrimp from Last Resort?? Good food; good times.

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , , | 5 Comments »

I’m not usually this nice – ride the wave

Posted by AllieB on July 19, 2011

I am a wealth of generosity today – I think I woke up on the right side of the bed (thankfully, not upside down).

First, may I direct your attention to the menu bar above – HOME, ALL ABOUT ALLIE, ATLANTA RESTAURANTS: A GUIDE, BEST OF BBT, and…BOOK LIST! I promised one P.V. (pre-virus), and it’s come to fruition. I wouldn’t call it comprehensive, necessarily, but it’s a good start. And, if I could steer you towards one read in particular, it would be Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand. It is by far the best book I’ve read in 2011. It’s topping all kinds of charts, but the subject matter seemed daunting and I’d been putting it off…don’t make the same mistake as me. It’s a WWII non-fiction story, and it is – in a word – spectacular.

WEEEEEEE! My mom gave me the hard copy of a WSJ article a couple of weeks ago featuring these leaping pigs, then InTouch featured the photo in some weird photo section they have in the back (InTouch is not for reading – it’s for pictorial perusal only), and then Yancey asked here it had come from, so I looked online and hark! here it is.

One guess whose handiwork this is.

CKB’s in town to do wedding stuff…..BOLO for a 27 Dresses-esque montage of hein b’maids dresses. Not for serious, of course, but just for fun. Part of MoH duties include vetoing things that are ugly, but I will gladly prance around in the most hein thing they’ve got for our own entertainment. That’s how it works, right? Bridal shoppes love me….BRIDES by Demetrios, in particular.

I am feeling unusually charitable this morning – I very easily could’ve segued to a mini-rant about why Katherine Heigl is the pits, but I refrained. I think it’s the pigs – the pigs are making me extra friendly. If you’ve got something you need from me, today would be the day to ask. Sister, yes I WILL make you that sandwich.

ALSO I fixed my insides and am now showing up properly on the Goog. “Baxter Bark Twice” gets you straight to my page…that was a huge pain.

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Book List

Posted by AllieB on July 18, 2011

See below for my list of recommended reading. This is woefully incomplete but until I can share a non ridiculous excel sheet, there’s no point in getting too complicated. Also, just because I like it doesn’t mean you will…but I have given these all of these BBT’s Stamp of Approval, so that should count for something.

Book Genre Blurb
The Girl in the Spider’s Web Mystery The fourth in the “Millennium” series, better known as Girl w Dragon Tattoo series; different author same everything else
Where They Found Her Mystery same author as “Reconstructing Amelia” – I liked it better. Keeps you guessing!
How to Start a Fire Female Fiction TheSkimm recommended this and I LOVED it. One of my fave books of the year; sounds like some sappy chick lit nonsense but is actually v smart and quirky
Luckiest Girl Alive Female Fiction I didn’t expect to like this as much as I did, couldn’t put it down once I started. People compare to Gone Girl and Girl on the Train and I guess similar but this more modern, takes place in NYC
Girl at War Historical Fiction College student in Manhattan tells story of growing up in Croatia during the Croatian/Serbian War; I really liked this
The Nightingale Historical Fiction This will be one of the best books you’ve read – takes place during WWII
What Alice Forgot Female Fiction you can’t miss with Lianne Moriarty
Natchez Burning Southern Mystery First of a trilogy – darker read, per Amazon: Rich in Southern atmosphere and electrifying plot turns, Natchez Burning marks the brilliant return of a genuine American master of suspense. Tense and disturbing, it is the most explosive, exciting, sexy, and ambitious story Greg Iles has written yet.
The Century Trilogy by Ken Follet Historical Fiction I cannot say enough good things. The third book comes out in Sept and I’m counting the days. The books start in early 1900’s and finish in late 80’s, with intertwining stories from Russia to California. These are for guys and girls and, while long, will suck you in immediately
I Am Pilgrim by Terry Hayes Mystery this just came out and is getting lots of buzz – “This astonishing debut espionage thriller depicts the collision course between two geniuses, one a tortured hero and one a determined terrorist, in a breakneck story reminiscent of John le Carré and Robert Ludlum at their finest.”
Three Wishes by Lianne Moriarty Female Fiction triplet sisters all at varying stages of 33 yrs old in Australia…funny/happy
This Is Where I Leave You by Jonathan Tropper Literature About to become a movie with Jasone Bateman, Tina Fey, Timothy Olyphant – “a riotously funny, emotionally raw novel about love, marriage, divorce, family, and the ties that bind-whether we like it or not.”
ALL ELIN HILDERBRAND Female Fiction She’s just my favorite – esp for beach/vacation
You Should Have Known by Jane Hanff Korelitz Mystery appreciate it for the character development, not the mystery
Night Film by Marisa Pessl  Mystery a long-awaited second novel that delivers. Critics loved it, and so does the Average Joe/Jane. Check it out.
Sycamore Row by John Grisham  Mystery I loved A Time to Kill and this novel features our beloved Jake Brigance.
One Summer: America, 1927 by Bill Bryson  Non Fiction who knew the summer of 1927  could be so interesting? Bill Bryson is one of my top 5 favorite authors of any genre
Rena’s Promise: A Story of Sisters in Auschwitz  Non Fiction one of the most amazing firsthand accounts from the Holocaust I have ever read
Wave by Sonali Deraniyagala  Non Fiction this woman lost literally everything in the 2004 Tsunami
Incendiary: A Novel by Chris Cleave  Literature this is my favorite of his. He doesn’t use punctuation which is normally a total dealbreaker, but it works – especially in this format (a letter to Osama bin Laden. You really should read this book.)
New York by Edward Rutherford Historical Fiction one of those multi-generational sagas about intertwining characters living in New York, starting in the 1600’s and going thru early 2000’s. Easy but still quality reading with the added bonus of some knowledge.
The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion  Contemporary Fiction this reminded me of Where’d You Go, Bernadette, and I’m constantly trying to find books that remind me of WYG, B. Set in Australia and narrated by a quirky scientist who’s searching for the perfect wife, it’s a fun/funny read.
 Methland by Nick Reding.  Non Fiction This nonfiction book is not for the faint of heart. I learned a whole lot about the crazy stuff people do while high on “crank” and sometimes it was a little too much information, but it was also interesting to read about the chain of events that spurned the epidemic…pretty fascinating, actually. Some parts made me queasy, and sometimes I got a little bored with the government stuff, but – and ask anyone with whom I’ve spoken in last month – I couldn’t stop talking about it

EMAIL ME with recommendations! Also, I’m on Goodreads if you want to check out a more thorough list.

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