Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

Archive for the ‘Really?’ Category

A lesson in dysfunctionality

Posted by AllieB on March 14, 2011

There’s fashion forward, and then there are pant boots (henceforth to be known as Poots).  In the same vein of the Teva Stiletto, Paris fashion house Hermès has created a hybrid of two things that need not be conjoined. Just like I do not wish to wear a stiletto sandal with the look and feel of a Teva, I think I’ll pass on pants made of leather with a high heeled platform boot attached the bottom.

from: style.com

For me, that I might ever don an article of clothing (well, clothing + footwear) whose name is a synonym to the word fart is a non-option. I bet that leather is really soft though…I guess, if it came to it and I absolutely had to have some Poots, it would be nice to have my rear end, legs, and feet ensconced in Poots by Hermès. Thanks, Mom, for leaving the WSJ article on my place mat – you are right; it did interest me.

Speaking of dysfunctional, the finale of the Bachelor is tonight. Neato. There’ve been what – 15 seasons of this show, 21 counting The Bachelorette, and ONE successful, longterm marriage? From where I’m sitting, it seems that the odds – they aren’t good. The whole premise of this show is just weird and contrived and abnormal, not to mention rife with infidelity…just sayin – it’s all pretty questionable. I’ll be watching last night’s episode of Shameless.

Posted in Arbitrary, Really? | Tagged: , , , | 5 Comments »

Common sense: turns out – not so common

Posted by AllieB on February 2, 2011

I don’t like going to the gym. I prefer to do my yogging outside – only heavy rain and wind will send me to el gimnasio, as was the case last night. It’s not so much the actual working out part that bothers me, it’s the people who decide the gym is a total free-for-all and completely abandon the basic manners they learned in kindergarten, like,  “don’t interrupt” and “it’s impolite to stare.”

I would genuinely like to know what part of profusive sweat, noise-canceling earphones, and heavy breathing says, “please come talk to me,” but some people seem to think it’s prime time to initiate a mindless convo.  Small talk is awkward enough as is – small talk whilst doing reverse crunches is the equivalent to what I imagine water-boarding is like.

That is why I am not a member of one of those massive chain facilities where women wear normal bras beneath their sports bras and guys make use of the free tanning beds – from what I’ve heard, those places are hotbeds for unpleasant and untimely socializing. Even though I do have several friends who work out where I do, we simply nod at each other and continue on our way…if this is the protocol with people to whom I am actually close, then it should surely apply to mere acquaintances.

My other point of issue is that, yes, I know my face turns red. We call this Dance-floor Allie, or Red-faced Allie, or Summertime Allie – whatever scenario aptly describes why my face has gone vermilion. At any rate, there is no need to stare, much less make remarks – both happen to me frequently and it’s really very offensive. Honestly, How Rude!

Credit: Hilary. These aren’t great photogs, but that is a nice shot of Dancefloor Allie..

Actually, I saw a girl on the treadmill yesterday whose face was not so much red as a purple-y maroon…it kinda reminded me of the sky right before a really bad storm – literally, it looked like her head was about to explode. At least mine airs on the side of tomato…if I were her, I’d probably consider an at-home workout regimen. Also, in keeping with the theme of my post, I would like to note that I neither stared at nor remarked upon her condition; I am simply reporting it here on BBT.

I saw the Hall Pass trailer for the first time last night – it looks funny! Also, it was fun to spot all the places in Atlanta where they filmed stuff for the movie. Applebee’s on Lindbergh and Johnny’s Hideaway were obvious venues in the clip I saw. Of course, I know there was some filming done at Cantina in Terminus as I actually hung out with Owen Wilson et al one evening…it was a very brief encounter. I described the meet & greet in post this fall – it did not go well.

A screenshot of the trailer – anyone between the ages of 20 and 60, possibly 70?, who ever “goes out on the town” in ATL can surely recognize that ceiling…

Posted in Really? | Tagged: , , , , | 5 Comments »

Best in Show: Philly Cheesesteak

Posted by AllieB on February 1, 2011

Philly Cheesesteaks are my favorite sandwich. There are so many factors that go into creating the perfect Philly: the bread-to-filling ratio; the cheese is not a topping but more of the glue of the filling; perfect amount of mayo and seasoning…I could keep going, but my bowl of Special K this a.m. is not cutting it and I can almost taste the wonderful goodness….

Without further ado…the establishment serving the best cheesesteak in Atlanta, IMO – the real crème de la crème – is:

Mr C’s on Howell Mill.

Go to there, order one, and see if I’m not right. However, if you’ve had one elsewhere that you know for a fact is superior to Mr. C’s  based on your own personal experience, contact me immediately. Email, cell, flare gun – whatever, I need to know. Mr C’s is great in general – they have tots and fried okra and cheap beer. One other place I would like to commend for consistently top-notch fare is Philly Connection; I would also, however, like to denounce them for the lack of locations ITP.

I looked up the highest rated sammies in ATL on Yelp, and I was alarmed to read about a place called Gut Busters. I wonder if their motto is, “Gut Busters: where indigestion is inevitable” – they probably give out Pepto Bismol tablets along with their plastic cutlery. Just sayin…they could’ve chosen a different name.

Update: per the input of a BBT subscriber, I totally dropped the ball by not including the Mad Italian. And he’s right, the Mad-I, as my mom always called it, is awesome for PC’s, but I haven’t been in almost two decades and wasn’t sure it was the same deal as I remembered…to make sure I am sharing the most accurate information possible, I will go in the near future and get back to you. Holy wow, that website looks phenom…

Speaking of Philly -> Philadelphia -> Pennsylvania…tomorrow is Groundhog Day. Experts are skeptical that Punxsutawney Phil will not see his shadow thus forecasting an early spring, particularly because PA is one of several states expected to be blasted (Gut Blasted?) by what could be the worst winter storm in the history of all the winter storms – there’s even talk of canceling Groundhog Day altogether. Really, Mother Nature? I think it’s time to take things down a notch…

It is decidedly not always sunny in Philadelphia.

Posted in Food & Drink, Really? | Tagged: , , , , | 8 Comments »

A girl crush and a girl I’d like to crush

Posted by AllieB on January 24, 2011

Dear Genie in a bottle or similar,

I have three wishes for today/this afternoon. Let’s see what we can work out.

  1. I wish I looked like Minka Kelly because she looks awesome in these pics for her new movie w Leighton Meester (can’t wait to see!), and AND she is Tim Riggins’s dreamweaver on FNL. I think I would really enjoy being his dreamweaver. Heeeey, Minka. First Mila, now Minka…I guess I have a thing for long-haired brunette beauties who have weird two-syllable M-names. Minka might be kind of boring, actually, but I’m still carrying my torch for Mila.
  2. I wish that Season Two of Nurse Jackie was on Showtime OnDemand
  3. I wish that Jessica Simpson would refrain from tweeting about her fiance’s “perfect Tush.” And I really really wish that, when I goog’ed “Jessica Simpson Tush,” I hadn’t learned about a song entitled Push Your Tush that J Simps wrote for her 2006 album, An Epic Fail A Public Affair. I really hate being such a jerk when it comes to Jessica, but she really brings out the curmudgeon in me and I get very frustrated with what a dope she is. Here are some lyrics. This is embarrassing.

My head feels like it might explode…I think the last stanza really did me in. Maybe I should wish for a greater understanding when it comes to the exhausting behavior of idiot celebrities on my next wishlist. Speaking of idiot celebrities, LiLo is out and about and looking well…! Wishing you only the best, LiLo…see look – I can be nice.

Posted in Celebs, Really? | Tagged: , , , , | 4 Comments »

Here’s what’s happening in your world tonight

Posted by AllieB on January 20, 2011

Good afternoon. This weather sucks.

BUT! Treehouse has deigned to join the rest of the free world in the Groupon et al craze, and for only $8 you can get $20 worth of food and/or booze without any restrictions! Click here for the deal; it’s only available until midnight.

Thanks for throwing us a bone, Treehouse. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I’ve stopped going in protest against their refusal to offer happy hour specials or Recession-friendly deals, but really – it’s about time. Maybe I should buy a few more…

I’ve grown tired of picking on Boobs Legsly, and Jessica Simpson seems to finally be heeding my advice by going out in public less, so I’ve been forced to find a new target for my celebrity ridicule. Taylor Swift…COME ON DOWN! Newsflash: your relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal was total baloney. Write your little ditty about picking apples in New York and sharing pumpkin spice lattes or whatever you need to do to mourn the loss of your fake – not to mention gay – boyfriend, get your platinum records and Grammy’s and make your millions, but for the LOVE OF GOD leave US Weekly out of it.

What the crap – how are you so boring. Just looking at you makes me want to take a nap. The only thing that could make you more boring would be doing something like not serving alcohol at your 21st birthday and having platters of cookies instead. Oh, wait…..

Girl Talk is tomorrow at the Tabernacle! If you don’t have tickets you’re probably S.O.L. unless you want to fork over $100…fortunately, I do not fall into that category, thanks to Leila, and have been accumulating glow sticks for weeks. I’ve also been preparing for my transition to Dance-Floor Allie by way of nightly stretching and some solo head banging – it’s like I’m the White Swan morphing into the Black…..except not because that would freak everyone out. DANCE PARTY!!!

Posted in Celebs, Really? | Tagged: , , , , , , | 8 Comments »