Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

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Badonkadonk

Posted by AllieB on May 2, 2011

“My a** is perfection” – Samantha Jones, SATC

Incidentally, so is Pippa Middleton’s. At least according to this Facebook page that has garnered over 150,000 “likes” since creation on Friday. Put that in your pocket for a rainy day, Pippa – that ain’t bad.

I do feel like I dropped the ball on my wedding coverage with the major gaffe of heralding Chelsey Davy’s appearance – she looked like a sloppy hot mess. Retract. I am DYING over Kate’s second dress – not because I like the angora balero, but because she looked stunning overall…Pippa continued her glam-a-thon with both her second dress (like, don’t love, but again – stunning) and her adorbs day after outfit. Kate’s an old married lady now, welcome to BBT’s new obsession: Pippa. Heck, the whole family has me wrapped around their finger.

From left (all from socialitelife.com):

  1. famous derriere
  2. second dress by Alice Temperley
  3. Saturday morning leaving The Goring – I need that blazer

OK, I think it’s time to move on…for today.

Cut to: Sweetwater Brewery, locale for my Ten Year High School Reunion. I was very startled to realize that Romy & Michelle’s High School Reunion was about their tenth hs reunion…startled, alarmed, angry, and unsettled. It made me feel the opposite of young – remember how OLD they always seemed!? Whatevs, it’s stupid to compare one’s own life with that of two fictional movie characters, ya know? Like, what good can come from that? Here is the sole photo from the Smilebooth photo booth-esque thing which I will share on BBT. Smilebooth + me = MORTAL ENEMIES.

 

Like I said, I hate Smilebooth.

Apropos of nothing, read this little article about how delightful Amy Poehler is – because she absolutely is, for many reasons, and not just because she laughed (in a non-malicious way) at Blake Lively.

She was on the scene when Patrick McMullan accidentally ripped the train of Blake Lively’s dress, gleefully crying out, “You ripped her dress! Patrick, you ripped her dress!” as if it were the greatest, most wonderful thing that had ever happened.

Also, Parks & Recreation is HILAR.

Posted in Arbitrary, Princess Kate | Tagged: , , , , , | 3 Comments »

It was everything I’d hoped it would be…

Posted by AllieB on April 29, 2011

And more.

I don’t even know where to start. It was perfect!! Pal, you mentioned that my…interest…in Princess Catherine was borderline SWF, and, after this morning, I have absolutely no defense. She was stunning. And so breezy! She had this huge grin on her face the whole time, and her little wave was just adorable – I was sitting on my couch, grinning like an idiot because her glee was so infectious. Per Buff’s observation, I would really like a program because the music and scripture were both especially good, and I would like to inquire as to whether or not the Royal Boys Choir is available for hire/will travel overseas.

from aol.com

I would get married in what Pippa’s wearing, even. I can’t even stand how perfect they both look! I need to pull up my thesaurus for “perfect.” I can’t decide if I want to dissect the four hours of television I watched play-by-play, or just keep rambling on about how perfect it was. I’ll do some more pics.

Clockwise from top left:

  1. Pippa with flower girls – gorg!
  2. Posh & Becks – breathtaking!
  3. The Head Harry Huntress, Chelsy Davey – stunning!
  4. Princes William & Harry – I really do love a man in uniform…
  5. Like something out of a fairy tale….sigh

I think I’ll call it a day – I think after I have time to process and decompress I’ll do a better job with my words… Tell you what, getting married really takes it out of you. A glass of champagne sounds nice.

Happy Wedding Weekend to Charlotte & Brooks!!! I wish I could be there…XOXO

Posted in Princess Kate | Tagged: , , , | 12 Comments »

What’s new, pussycat?

Posted by AllieB on April 28, 2011

As the heavens prepared to open above Metro Atlanta last night, having wreaked real, tragic havoc over Mississippi and Alabama, people around town made appropriate preparations: got the animals inside, made sure they had candles/flashlights, some of us ensured we had plenty of wine and library books…you get the picture: time to hunker down. Refer to the following BBM convo:

Me: Mom, are you going to Body Pump today?

Mom: No, I’m going to a concert at Cobb Energy Center

Me: A concert?! Mom, the weather is supposed to get really bad later!

Mom: Sorry to miss BP!

I thought this turn of events was a bit curious – although my mom does love concerts (Hippie Fest ’07, Rod Stewart & Stevie Nicks), but then forgot about it and carried on with my evening. It wasn’t until hours later when I was chatting with my older sister, CKB, that I learned what was going on. My mother was at the TOM JONES concert. TOM JONES. Tom “Sexbomb” Jones. What? I don’t even know.

Soundbite! J Simps on her “workout regimen” for her upcoming nuptials (PopEater, credit: Julia)

“I just have to work out on my own. There is no regimen I need to follow. There’s no diet I need to follow…No exercise is fun! I am going to dance around my bedroom and hopefully lose some weight — and lift some weights and do what I can!”

Every time Jessica gets the urge to speak, she should resist that urge and not speak. She’s the only person to whom I’d say this, but: try NOT using your words. I goog’ed “Jessica Simpson dancing.” Have I gone too far? This isn’t very nice.

from allwomenstalk.com

Maybe think about tossing in some pilates along with your boudoir frolics, or going on the occasional yog…just in case.

It’s almost here….my favorite thing: THE ROYAL WEDDING!!!! Kate’s getting hitched! I set my alarm for 4:01. If I can’t stay awake for it, at least I will be absorbing the coverage as I sleep…omg I seriously can’t wait. I’m afraid I’m not going to be doing any live-blogging, 1. because the chances of me staying awake are very slim, and 2. I don’t know how to live blog. Rest assured, I’ll have plenty to say after the fact tomorrow afternoon, so….BOLO.

 

 

Posted in Arbitrary, Celebs, Princess Kate | Tagged: , , , , | 1 Comment »

Raising the Bar

Posted by AllieB on April 27, 2011

Meet Barmy. Barmy has a teeth tat of Prince William and Kate Middleton.

British plumber Barmy Baz Franks, 29, got a dentist to use ultra-fine brushes and stencils to paint images of the smiling royals.

Barmy, this is not the best example of you making good life-choices, particularly since it cost $1,650 of YOUR OWN MONEY. These drawings are called “gnasher tats” and they’ll last for three months. That’s two months, 30 days, and 23 hours too long.

Speaking of jacked-up grilles, I share with you today’s word of the day:

Wonky: askew or messed up

She’s got that wonky tooth that needs some dental attention – it might be rotting.

Yeah, I saw him last night – he had to leave early, his eyes went wonky before 10.

I just like saying it, plus – and you know how I feel about alliterations – I can say it with Wednesday. Like ‘Wacky’ except for Wonky: it’s Wonky Wednesday.

My parents made me do my very own Easter egg hunt on Sunday, thereby acquainting me with a whole new level of self-mortification. I guess there were perks: I found $20 (FACE, Jordan), and I was thrilled to get the silk scarf I picked out in Pakistan and the beautimous earrings they brought me from Paris…but, still. Anyway, back to wonky: it pains me to say this because she is the most best dog in the whole world, but Missy Baxter just does not photograph well.

My EYES…!!! MY EYES!!!

(photo by Mr. Baxter – in his defense, I think Missy’s peepers skewed the light for the whole shot)

Based on other people I’ve talked to, I’m all alone with this, but you should probably pay attention anyway because I tend to be on the cutting edge of most things. Happy Endings, the new show that comes on at 10 on Wednesdays on ABC, is hilarious. Watch it, record it, whatever – give it a chance. Is it the next Friends? No. (Friends is irreplaceable.) Did I laugh out loud when I watched it, both after wine and again a few days later without wine? Yes, I did.

Joey: All right! Westminster Abbey! Hands down, best Abbey I’ve ever seen.What do you think of the Abbey, Chandler?

Chandler: I think it’s great. It’s great. Y’know, they’re thinking of changing the name of this place.

Joey: Really? To what?

Chandler: To Put the Camera Away!!!

Joey: Man, you are Westminster Crabby.

-The One with Ross’s Wedding


Posted in Arbitrary, Princess Kate | Tagged: , , , , | 4 Comments »

Hair Emergency

Posted by AllieB on April 26, 2011

When asked in a recent interview what her fiance, Eric I Don’t Even Care to Goog His Last Name, thinks is the ‘sexiest’ part about her, Jessica Simps responded:

“my billion dollar business”

“my enormous boobs”

“my eyes.”

Aw, bless her heart…

In related-yet-unrelated J Simps news: I purchased a pair of her wedges last week and I totally luv them. See – I’m not hating on her entire person, just a few of things the things she says/wears/does. Her shoes are cute and reasonable and these are quite comfy. I just can’t really hate someone whole heartedly, so I have to find their redeeming qualities. Unless we’re talking about Taylor Swift, because I can’t even stand her music anymore. I read an interview with Taylor recently that says she has “no interest” in becoming a “sex symbol.” Believe you me, Taylor, that is not going to be a problem.

Oh dear: the forecast in London for Friday calls for rain…lots of rain. Kate is known for her luscious, always perfectly coiffed locks, but there’s some weather that defies even the strongest of serums, and this is what concerns me – I know Kate’s hair, and it’s not dissimilar to my own in texture (not appearance – do I have my own staff blow-drying and styling my hair daily? No, I do not). This means to say: humidity is NOT our friend.

I stand corrected. There are literally no bad photos of Kate with poufy hair. Here I was, trying once again to level to playing field betwixt Kate and myself, and it’s just not possible. Her hair truly is glorious enough for the rest of us.

From left:

  1. the closest Kate has ever come to a hair emergency
  2. one of my most emergent hair emergencies (Notre Dame – Paris ’98)
  3. Kate’s hair win
  4. I had to throw myself a bone after #2

Forget any concerns I may’ve had re: Kate’s coif. She’ll be fine. I look forward to when I marry Prince Carl of Sweden and can also have perfect hair, every single day.

Posted in Arbitrary, Princess Kate | Tagged: , , , , , , | 9 Comments »

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