Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

Archive for the ‘Arbitrary’ Category

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A Change of Address

Posted by AllieB on June 28, 2012

Gather round, y’all – BBT’s got news: I’ve decided to move to New York. True story – come Labor Day, bye bye ATL and helloooo Big Apple. I’ve got lodging sorted out (at least temporarily – and it’s not here), so now all I need to focus on is that pesky job thing. This is where you come in – put your ear to the ground and let’s find me employment in NYC. Okgreatthanks.

Don’t worry, I’m not going to be all mopey or anything…at least not right away, and the reason I’m announcing it now is that I know people residing in NYC read this, and I also know that the world wide web is an excellent networking tool, so I’m making use of my assets. I am, however, going to compile a bucket list of things to do before I no longer declare ATL as my current city on Facebook – here’s what I’ve got so far:

  • Climb Stone Mountain. Haven’t done this since I was like 6 and I want to do it again. So far I’ve recruited Fleming, as long as it’s not hot…so I might need back-up.
  • Clermont Lounge. Come 1 AM don’t let me come up with some lame excuse as to why I can’t go – take me kicking and screaming. I’m 90% sure I haven’t been before – sacrelig, I know.
  • Dine in the Sun Dial Restaurant. Possible I’ve never done this either…which also seems wrong.
  • Go to Decatur – maybe even take MARTA to Decatur? K and A have done this…and if they’ve done it, any excuse I conjure up is irrelevant (not because y’all don’t do stuff, but I think we all know where you (and most Atlantans) stand on MARTA)

Et cetera. Hopefully I will be a better city citizen in NYC than I am here. Besides my knowledge of back roads and dive bars, I’m apparently not so Atlanta-savvy…

So that’s exciting!!! BBT goes to the Big Apple. Who knows what will happen….Sloane, let’s be besties and maybe I can right your coattails to literary success??

I just tried to segue off into a new subject about my massive crush on Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte, but that’s going to have to wait – putting my news on BBT just made it very real…and now I’m even more excited, so I’ll keep it short and sweet. I do want to apologize to those whom I should have told personally. I owe you better, and I’m sorry, but this all came about pretty quickly, and I wanted to give you plenty of time to plan my going away party get my name out there re: employment…

Lady Liberty and I have already been in touch – it’s good to know the right people. (Credit: who else. Hilary.)

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A year older, wiser, awesomer

Posted by AllieB on June 20, 2012

Thanks for all the birthday love!! I have a feeling 29 is going to be my year. Seriously – good things are in the mix for BBT, so BOLO for that. An extra special thank you to Tina, who put her exceptional photo-shopping skills to good use and made me this:

The Royal Couple. Let it be known that I don’t have a crush on William, my crush is on Kate…and her glorious hair. On a different note, I hear they’re planning a remake of Single White Female?

I’d like to also give a little shout-out to 5 Seasons Brewery on the Westside for proffering such a pleasant spot and service for the celebration of moi. Their pizza: meh (I’m pretty sure it’s gluten-free, which pizza should never be), their crab ragoons/flash-fried dumpling goodness: AMAZING. It’s kind of a random, not-oft-thought-of spot, but their patio is great, especially once the sun goes down, and the view is lovely – I do love a good vista!

Clockwise from top: FRIENDS! Dunce Hat (remember the brewery debacle of Oct 2k10? I’ve come such a long way since then). Thank you, Perez.

I’m having quite the love affair with the Westside right now…the JCT Rooftop Bar is absolutely idyllic for happy hour (rose, anyone?), and JCT’s Sunday Supper is really a must-do. For $24 you get homemade biscuits, a deviled egg, a nature salad (lot’s of nature in that thing, thankfully no peas – tis delish), then you choose a meat for yourself and then pick three sides for the table. I went with Mr. and Mrs. Baxter on Sunday, and I got the fish and grits (tile fish served on a bed of grits, which actually meant I got an extra fourth side…if I know how to do anything, it’s order), and then we shared sweet corn with bacon and bleu cheese, a summer squash saute, and fresh tomatoes with a light brushing of E.V.O.O. and ground pepper. OMG YUM. We also had a nice malbec, and the whole evening was very pleasant. BBT: HIGHLY recommends.

I updated my Book List.

Obsessed with this nail polish (gracias, Dinka!) – both color and name:

essie – off the shoulder

LeAnn Rimes is the worst, and this latest gaffe really takes the cake (wordplay): check out the birthday treat she designed for her now-husband’s birthday. I say “now-husband” because he was married to someone else when they started seeing each other. In case you can’t tell, it’s her and hubby cuddling in bed on the top layer with his two children sitting alone at the bottom. Someone should call child services.

Wrong. So Wrong. (via UsWeekly)

Get after it – it’s humpday!

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Everyone is entitled to my opinion

Posted by AllieB on May 31, 2012

Herro. I started this post in the middle and then wrote the ending and then this part, so you might be like, “BBT, wtf are you talking about.” Try and keep up.

Much to my GREAT excitement, the Opening Ceremonies of the XXX Olympiad are in less than two months!!! This also means, obviously, less than two months til two whole weeks of bird dogging Kate Middleton’s wardrobe choices. I fear the Duchess is getting a bit thin, however…I do hope she’s keeping the myriad pressures of Royal Life at bay and not transferring them to an eating disorder. Too skinny = bony = weathered. No one likes a weathered princess.

Never will I ever criticize B Spears – nothing she can do will ever undo her MTV Video Music Award performance in 2000 – but the list of items she requested for her dressing room on the X-Factor is just…typical. I wonder what kind of chicken? KFC? Popeye’s?

*34 Herve Leger dresses
*12 Snickers bars
*10 snack-size bags of Doritos
*six cases of Diet Coke containing 24 cans, which must be replenished every week
*12 vases of magnolia blossoms in her dressing room
*10 pieces of chicken
*four pints of potato salad every week.
*beauty team which includes a personal manicurist, a facialist and a massage therapist

My list would read as follows:

*Olivia Palermo’s wardrobe
*My e-reader (hopefully if I have my own dressing room I will have upgraded from my Nook, version Archaic)
*One bag of cheetos from which I can have a few each day; this will be strictly monitored by my stand-in willpower, which I will need provided by way of large, scary woman. See qualifications below
*large, scary woman to stand in as my willpower. Responsibilities will include: monitoring cheeto intake, forcibly removing me from sofa to exercise…I still don’t understand why Jessica Simpson hasn’t hired one of these yet.
*one orchid/table surface
*pizza. Pizza from Tartufo, Fellini’s, Antico, and Mellow Mush…the pizzas are to be delivered hot, fresh, and in random order – keep me guessing!
*three Labrador puppies for 20 minutes each day, with one always on-call
*beauty team which includes a personal manicurist, a facialist and a massage therapist

So, this went viral: a letter regarding uncouth behavior at the local Piedmont Driving Club. I’m going to refrain from comment, but here are some high(low?)lights:

  • one member decided to play the 14th hole completely naked. I have not researched it, but I suspect this is a crime in Georgia
  • one member decided to show off to other members, and a caddie, his ability to pick up a golf ball with his naked butt cheeks.

Moving along…Domestic Allie made a rare appearance the other weekend. I guess Tina just brings out the best in me…she and Kirk whipped up a pretty awesome meal of kabobs at their new house, and everyone had a great time. I helped skew the skewers for a little while, but mostly I was in charge of watching feeding Tina wine. Kabobs are a messy business; someone’s gotta keep the chef hydrated.

This is us in our aprons. I’ve opted for the 1960’s photo finish in Picasa because aprons are sooo 1960’s.

I’ve always considered myself to be fairly well educated, and I am a proud alumna of The University of Georgia, but I’m feeling a bit slighted re: course selection…my Art History class on Theosophy (I don’t even know what that word means anymore) is way less relevant than these options. (Source: Reader’s Digest, June 2012. I know.)

  • How To Watch Television – Montclair State. I mean, I could teach that class, amiright??
  • Harry Potter: Finding Your Patronus – Oregon State. BBT says: legit.
  • Alien Sex – University of Rochester. Um, no.

I try to read this blog once a week because it is so funny.

THE FIRST TIME I LIVED ON MY OWN

This isn’t not not true.

TGIT! Today is the last day of May, so tomorrow is the first day of June.

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The skies are angry

Posted by AllieB on May 22, 2012

Summer has arrived. Not the wet, hot blanket heat that we can look forward to in a month or so, but the totally insane, violent storms that come in out of nowhere, like the one last night. I was cruising down Peachtree, noticing how weird it was that it was raining in the Northbound lanes but not the Southbound ones (hmm strange), when all of a sudden I was blindsided by walnut-sized hail. What the hail!?* Anyway, I’m just glad Whole Foods has that underground parking option, and I never thought I’d say anything positive about a parking deck.

I’ve been getting around recently: here, read about one of Atlanta’s newest restaurants, Campagnolo in Midtown.

Located at the corner of 10th and Piedmont, Campagnolo is a festive hub of a restaurant with a chill yet “we’re new and hip” vibe. It’s longer than it is wide, but the patio and main dining area are pleasantly spacious and open. I felt a bit claustie as I made my way back to the bathroom, but that could also have something to do with the wall-to-wall humans packed in for a birthday party. In the grand tradition of myself, I arrived 30 minutes late and missed the apps, but I understand there was a homemade focaccia with baked goat cheese that was excellent. What I thought was excellent was the rose, the Le Cengle from France, and I also enjoyed my Zucchini Piccata. I didn’t take pictures because it hsa been requested that I not do that, but it was good. It had capers, and I love capers. Sissy and Dani split an orecchiette dish with spicy homemade sausage and cherry tomatoes, the portions of which were quite large, especially since they split the $10 small size. One of the highlights of my night was hearing Dani order this.

We had a lot of fun. There’s free valet parking, which is good because this little block of Midtown gets real saucy on Friday evenings….

everyone say, 'goat cheeese'

If I want to be a restaurant food critic, I’m going to have start eating the restaurant’s food…

Speaking of cheese, this past weekend someone – I believe it was Boda, and I apologize if I am misappropriating credit where it’s due – posed the question, “why can’t cheese be a power food?” Honestly, why can’t it? I see no reason why a bowl of queso can’t have the same perks as a big bushel of broccoli, except for the obvious fact that it’s impossible. I just wish things had gone differently from the get-go re: allocation of nutrition. Thanks a lot, science.

I love you Liz Lemon: click here for a very funny photographic timeline that chronicles the tumultuous history of Liz’s locks. Remember when she studied abroad in Germany?? It’s like a quick review of all the best episodes.

OH! The power of social media has finally paid off for me, personally: I bought the $34 year subscription to UsWeekly yesterday, and then went about sharing my personal link via various social media channels (The Twitter, FB), and if three people clicked thru on my link and purchased it then I got my deal at no charge…well, and this surprises no one, it worked and now I can look forward to the weekly gift of celebrity smut for a full 52 weeks for free. Sometimes I really am my mother’s daughter.

*HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CARO!! And thank you for allowing me to filch your words for today’s title. I will repay you in pizza tonight. XOXO.

Have a great day – hopefully one that has more direction and focus than this here blog post. I’m off to Flywheel…hayulp.

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Give an inch and they’ll take a mile

Posted by AllieB on May 17, 2012

If you live in Atlanta like I do, then you’ve been inundated with the arrival of the latest Willy’s spin-off, Lime. Do not go to there. Even if your co-workers are all, “hey, let’s check out that new place Lime!” say, in a strong, stern, slightly assertive voice, “No, thank you.” It’s just not good. They’re trying way too hard to be good, and it’s embarassing for everyone. I went the other day because I had a coupon for a free taco it’s close to work/my house, and it was a mistake. K, I should’ve listened to you. I guess their salsa bar featuring 7 different salsas is ok, and the quesadilla wasn’t horrible, but their CHIPS (the standard by which all tex-mex restaurants should be judged, IMO) are awful. Might as well bust open a bag of Tostitos and call it a day. BBT says: pass. The good news is…. Barberitos is opening in The Peach Shopping Center!! Yes, it’s true, and I’m so excited.

I’ve come to the conclusion that people who cut hair are taught that the measurement “one inch” actually means “as much as you want plus a little more”. I got my hair cut yesterday, and when I told her I wanted only a teeeeeny tiny bit trimmed she said, “Sure! We’ll only take off half an inch – three-fourths of an inch at most.” I was so excited – finally someone who understood me. Well, the only way she took off half an inch is if by inch she meant FOOT. This is ridiculous. I was in a rush post-appointment to get another much more urgent appointment, so I didn’t take the time to check out the damage, but I’m not happy. It’s too bad I don’t drive that minivan anymore because I finally look the part. Flat.Face.

48 Things That Will Make You Feel Old. Enjoy!! What an uplifting start to my day – thanks, YKenna. Pardon me while I go get my personal affairs in order…

good god. We're as old as the dinosaurs

Ah, this helps: 37 People Who Have No Idea What They’re Doing.

Dad on the subway: you're doing it wrong!

Thirsty Thursday!! Have a wonderful day, do unto others as you would have them do unto you, and always remember that three rights make a left.

*A special thank you to LucyC for ensuring my grammatical accuracy.

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